When in a conversation, quite often we do not realize that we are not good listeners. We have the tendency to occupy our brain thinking more about what we are going to say, about what our reply is going to be.
In order to make the best of a conversation, to take advantage of all the benefits it can offer to us, we need to rewire our brain so we can concentrate more on what the other person is saying. It is all about attention and intention for listening effectively.
If we give our full attention to the other person, if the attention is genuine, with the intention to understand, to learn, we will be really listening, grasping more, and empowering ourselves with new ideas, with more knowledge.
Everyone has something to teach us, if we let them!
We already are very familiar with our points of views, our thoughts, and ideas, so when we fully focus our attention on someone else's ideas and points of view we will be opening another door for acquiring more wisdom and expanding our horizons. When the attention is genuine the other person in the conversation will notice our interest and will be more willing to share more and communicate more.
To borrow a phrase from the Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh "Our attention is the most precious gift we can give anyone".
Effective communication is about more than exchanging information. It is about fully understanding what the other person has to say.
We can improve our skills for listening in a way that gains the complete meaning of what is being said, enriching our ability to communicate better, being true to our intent to pay all the attention possible so we can understand and learn.
We need to focus not only on the words said but also on the nonverbal signals, the body language, how words are said or emphasized, or the tone and feeling reflected in the voice (the true meaning behind the words), which reinforce the purpose of the communication and the way it flows.
Listening effectively is another step in the pursuit of excellence.
Now on a personal level, and listening to my heart, I made the decision that for the time being, I will make a pause with writing my newsletter.
In every sense possible, this has been for me a wonderful experience that taught me amazing things. I am so grateful to the people that encouraged me to write it... also in a big way, so thankful for the heartfelt comments I received from the readers - they humbled me and in instances made me very teary. Thanks so much to all.
To say goodbye at this moment, I am sharing some thoughts about optimism from Robert Muller.
Muller devoted 40 years of his life to working for the United Nations. In spite of having to constantly witness the worst that the world has to offer he described himself as an optimist by choice:
On optimist by choice is a person who has studied reality, come to peace with all the evidence that men are destructive an evil, and chooses instead a model of humanity contained in the lives of men and women whose goodness, beauty, and pursuit of truth represent the glorious exception that illuminates the darkness of fear and mediocrity.
— Omaira
Are we listening?
For my future newsletters I will be writing them once a month instead of once a week. The next one then, is going to be in a month from now.
I appreciate so much the support and encouragement I have received. Thanks .
I am an optimist by choice, but contrary to Robert Muller, I think most of humanity is good, hard working, well meaning, loving, and caring. Poverty, inequality, injustice, lack of opportunity and education, are troublesome. Many people are working to overcome those problems. Friendship, cooperation, and solidarity are especially important for the survival of our kind. Omaira’s newsletter on listening is great. Listening with intention and attention allows us to communicate, share and understand other persons thoughts, ideas, and feelings. Sharing improves life in society. Listen, listen, listen. The world is with us… Omaira: I hope you will write again after a pause. I enjoyed your newsletters. Thanks very much.